Change

22 December 2010

Change is hard. But it’s not necessarily bad.

I was reflecting on this in light of the passing of my 12-year-old standard poodle, Pip, on October 27. Her death, from cancer, was swift. She died just two weeks after a tumor was discovered. Within a week of that discovery, we knew how extensive the cancer was and that there was nothing we could do. She didn’t seem to suffer much and she didn’t leave us any question that it was her time.

When you have an ill or aging dog, you can’t help but think about what life will be like without her. Sometimes it’s unbearable to even think about it. (And, indeed, probably the worst thing about having dogs is the near-inevitability that you’ll experience life without them.)

Learning Pip’s diagnosis, watching her decline, and then letting her go was really difficult. In that time, I fretted over what life would be like without her, particularly for Kirby, our seven-year-old standard poodle who is somewhat insecure and who had never known life in our home without Pip.

But here it is almost two months later and I’ve begun reflecting on the fact that there have been some positives about this change. First, Kirby is doing amazingly well. He seemed to say his goodbyes to Pip a couple of days before she died. He was there at the time of her passing (our wonderful vet, Patrick Tate of Webster Groves Animal Hospital came to our house to do the euthanasia) and he carried on well afterward.

As our grief subsided, the positives started to emerge. With our senior citizen dog gone, our walks with Kirby have become faster and longer. I’m able to work on training him during walks, now that I have an extra hand. (And we both love that.) Pip was very sound sensitive and would bark at the sound of a car door slamming. Kirby would react to her bark and carry on as well. Now Kirby sleeps through some of those little triggers, so our house isn’t as noisy. Taking one dog along on errands, like trips to the airport, is easy. With two, it was a hassle and usually didn’t happen. And, of course, one dog is much less expensive than two. (The food, treats, and grooming add up.)

Please don’t take this to mean I’m not sorry Pip is gone. I miss her terribly. But it’s caused me to reflect on an important aspect of change. It’s something we often dread, but there can be good aspects to it, when we pause to consider them.

If you’re facing some change and find the prospect unsettling, perhaps you can consider the up side to the change that’s about to happen.

I’d like to close this with a picture of Pip (she’s the grey one) and Kirby (who’s white) playing with my friend, Sally’s border collie-great pyrenees cross, Amos, at the dog park a few years ago. We miss you, Pip!